Monday, October 24, 2005

Not old. Just older.

One hour before midnight. Before I say goodbye to my youth. Yeah, In one hour I'll be 28 years old.
As Indiana Jones said: it's not the years, honey, it's the mileage.
Sometimes I feel so old. I look back and see all the things that I've done wrong...I feel the weight of all those mistakes of the past. Things I didn't say. Things I didn't do. I feel the loneliness, and the confusion. Remember when you were a kid and you thought that all the grown ups had all the answers? Well, we sure as hell don't. Yeah, sometimes you just can't avoid thinking about those things. Asking questions that can not be answered. Blaming yourself for things you can't undo.

But you know what? To be honest, I don't really care. Half of the time I have no idea what I'm doing. I guess that as you grow older you just learn to forgive yourself, and if you're smart enough, you learn to love the little things in your life: Spending an afternoon at the movies. Eating an ice cream in the middle of the week. Listening to music and playing air guitar. Watching the moon and the stars. Feeling the wind in your face. Receiving a smile from a stranger. Understanding and loving your parents a little bit more. Knowing that you're lucky to have good and true friends that love you in spite of your flaws.

Damn I'm lucky. I'll shut up now. I have to enjoy my 27 years! Less than one hour left. Hmm.. I wonder where can I get a stripper on a Monday night.. hm...See ya, sinners. Party tomorrow at my place!!