Sunday, February 27, 2005

Sorry, my love. I spent the night with a guy named Oscar.

IIIIIIT's aaaa wonderful night for Oscar! Please tell me you remember that song. Billy Crystal used to sing it when he was the Academy Awards' host. Oh, those glorious days. Anyway, I'm REALLY happy tonight. Clint Eastwood won for best Director and Million Dollar baby as Best Picture!!!

Clint is GOD. Period.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let me start from the beginning.
Once upon a time there was a place called Hollywood, where regular human beings, (only with lots of money and interesting jobs) lived there. These guys were chosen by the world to be their heroes; The gods of our era. (Yes, maybe you're thinking this is an overstatement, but don't deny that if you are sitting in a diner and suddenly Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt or any other actor arrive and say hi to you, your heart would beat a thousand times faster than usual). Anyway, these guys have a role. To create. To tell stories. To make us cry and laugh. To make us believe we're living other lives, even if it's just for the two hours the film lasts.

So, once every year, there's one night where we see these gods up close. Where we get to see them as flesh and blood human beings. That night is in the Academy Awards.
7:30 pm . I started watching the show. But there was the Rock issue.I got to be honest. I was not really amused with the idea of having Chris Rock as the host. I think sometimes his sense of humor is...Cheap. Anyway, I got to admit he made me laugh a couple of times. He did okay. So I kept watching, looking for my favorite actors, but as the show went on, something weird happened.

There were NO actors at all!

Where the hell was everyone? Did you see the AA on TV? Isn't the auditorium supposed to be filled with stars? Where were they?? I saw like ten of them. Honest. In the first row there were the nominees and behind them....Extras? Their cousins? The bodyguards? Hell, I have no idea who were those guys?! And remember how the Academy never let the auditorium look empty? How they used to hire some guys to fill in while some actor was on the bathroom or making out someplace else? Well, I guess the Academy needs to hire more of those guys because the whole place looked like a church on Monday.
But I hey! I can live with that. I try not to be so negative, but I really got to say how I hated a couple of things:
- The intro of the night. The presentation, video, short film, movie about movies or however you want to call it, seemed it was made five minutes before the show. The images were great, but the music they used and how the used it was just TERRIBLE.
-I hated the "original" songs. It's really depressing if you think that those were the best of the year.
-I hated Salma Hayek talking for five minutes. She's really annoying. Why? Ahm...Because I say so! Besides she got to kiss Pierce Brosnan in "After the Sunset". That's enough to hate her.
- Who the hell invited P. Diddy and Prince? No offense but this are the Academy Awards!! Not the Grammys.
- Remember when they showed us a tiny video of the documentaries and short films that were nominated? Well, no videos this time.

Anyway...Enough complaining for one night. Now the good part:

- CLINT WON!!!
- CLINT WON!!!!!!
- CLINT WON!!!
- Oh yeah and...CLINT WON!!!
No, seriously, I agreed with most of tonight's decisions. Morgan Freeman, Jammie Foxx, Cate Blanchett, Charlie Kaufman, Sideways for original script, The Incredibles, those were good decisions. Sorry for you Mr. Scorcese. Maybe next year. Or next decade. Whatever.

I'll stop boring you now. Check your favorite movie sites (imdb.com, darkhorizons.com, aint-it-cool-news.com, etc) and rejoice once again reading that...CLINT WON!!! WOHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

God, he's sexy.

Have a nice week, sinners!